INS jokes
Your hairline is so far back that when your teacher puts you in the front of the class, your hairline is quite in the back.
Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.
What did one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"
This ole boy that's locked up called his ole lady and got into it with her, and she said, "Well, fuck you, I don't need you no more anyway. I got 2 or 3 guys out here wanting me and trying to fuck me."
He said, "Well, honey, that's the least of my worries. I got 10 or 12 guys in here tryin' to fuck me."
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
Happy was a cute hippo.
Happy sleeps in the water.
Happy walks on land.
Happy runs on Savannahs.
Happy swims in mud.
Happy takes a bath.
My plants in my garden are like the Twin Towers; neither of them fell, just the flowers.
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
Who is the Hamburglar's perverted cousin?
The Turdburglar.
You really do not want to see the mess these two make of the washrooms in a fast food joint.
I wondered why there was red all over my bathroom til I found out that my sis had dyed her hair red. Man, it looked like somebody died in there! Lol.
What did the moose say after leaving the gay bar?
"Man, I blew 50 bucks in there."
"Ya tryna run? Hop in the van."
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: The U.S. in 1919!
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
Stephen Hawking, rest in PC World.
Want to hear a joke? Just look in the mirror!
The 11th of September is considered 9/11 in America. The Twin Towers fell on 9/11 in 2001, but to call an emergency in America, you dial 911! 😮 You could say they dialed that correctly.
The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.
Your hairline so back that back in the day of your hairline, Burger King was called "Burger Prince."