INS jokes
My nephew hated working outside in landscaping, so I got him a job in the twin towers; I don't know why he keeps complaining about it being an inside job.
Friend: Hey, let me give you a little riddle. There's a table [for] four people who are supposed to sit [at]. There is you, me, Will, Mary. In which order will they sit?
Other friend: Uhm, you, me, Mary, and Will?
Friend 1: Nope, guess again!
Other friend: Okay, what about "Will you marry me?" Oh, wait...
Friend 1: Of course!!!! :D
When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.
John Kreese's forehead broke when silver hit 'em in the forehead.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
Can anyone play me in a no limits femdom RP on Kik?
Yo mama is so strict that in The Outsiders, she was Darry.
What do a tank and a warship have in common?
They're overweight.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop some HOT BARS!
How do you know when a rapper's been in the kitchen?
The microwave goes, "ding, ding!"
If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.
Roses are red, violets are blue. You belong in a zoo, but don't worry, I'll be there too. Just not in a cage, I'll be laughing at you.
The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."
I got hit in the balls by a tennis ball.
Y'know, I never knew Obi-Wan Kenobi participated in an anime, "Snow White with the Red Hair," up until now.
What do you call a failure in another language?
Me.
What is the definition of clapped?
Ur mum when I am in her bed.
This is just a bad emo pickup line, lmao.
Are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in!
Why did the towers fall? Because someone in Call of Duty hijacked the planes and crashed them into it.
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday.
God being a sniper is so fun!