INS jokes
Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?
Because they don't have balls.
What does a shark and a computer have in common?
They both have megabytes.
Two atoms are walking down the street, and they run into each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I’m positive!"
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin mobile.
I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."
What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
Why do pedophiles never win a race?
Because they are always coming in a little behind.
Say what you want against pedophiles, but they slow down in school zones.
If Chuck Norris was a Spartan in the movie 300, the movie would be called 1.
Look in a mirror.
What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day?
"Deja moo!"
There's 10 kind of people in the world. Those who know binary and those who don't.
Two artists had an art contest. It ended in a draw.
What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A candy baa.
Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.
What happens at night in Bangladesh?
It gets Dhaka.
What did Spock encounter in the Enterprise toilet?
The Captain's Log.