INS jokes

Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun.

Jack got mad and kicked Jill in the ass because she couldn't make him cum.

Hello Honey Bunches, it's me, Your Narrator. I was told by my buddy youthpartorryan he's in the middle of a war... I may be super wholesome but war against my buddy? Ho ho ho, no! A STORM IS COMING. #BestFriends

If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?

Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!

Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.

Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.

When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."

A 28 year old woman, Olga, in Meshchovsk, Russia took justice into her own hands when a 32 year old male robber, Viktor, decided to rob her salon. She tied him, feeding him only Viagra, having sex with him over and over. After a few days, she released him after he stated he learned his lesson and wouldn't go to the police. He lied and went to the police anyways. Both were arrested.

After his sentence was over, Viktor sat down to speak to the local news. The reporter asked Viktor, "How was this whole ordeal?" Viktor replied, "I've had better."

What's a benefit of being an orphan? The chips always come in a family size :)

What do orphans call a family photo? A selfie.

"My sister said she was the only smart one in the class."

"What about the teacher you learn *from*?"

Tell someone to look in their shirt and spell attic. Hehe.

A couple has sex in the dark every single night.

One night, the wife gets curious about what goes on, so they start f...ing, and she flicks the light on. When she flicks the light on, she catches him with a dildo playing with her pussy. She's so mad that she started ranting and raving. The husband says, "Honey, I know you're mad, and I'll explain the toy. Just do me one favor: explain the children."

Hi, this is a good prank I did.

So, my brother LOVES his phone and so... I put it in the toilet and then flushed it, but it wouldn't go down. So, then I gave it to him and he threw it and then it broke. HAHAHAHAHAHA

(Prankster, tell me if you don't like me doing pranks because it is your thing.)

Bye guys! I hope you liked this prank! (And his phone did not really break, it just cracked really bad lol)

Yo mama so fat, when she joined NASA, they put her in orbit and the next day there was a lunar eclipse.

I got raped when I was 5 in my princess pajamas by my dad. Nobody laughed at these jokes; they just cried.

Why do dwarfs suck a cow's udder instead of being breastfed? Because they are too short.

Robber 1: *gets shot in ass*

Robber 2: You have to shit in a bag for life lol.

Robber 1: What, the Tesco or Asda one?

My little cousin's birthday was in a few days, and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming "HOT WHEELS!"

Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?

'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!

My grandpa was in 9/11. He was the best pilot.

So there's a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says, "Step on a crack and you break your mother's back." The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother's back breaking.

The little girl's father looks in terror, she then says, "Step on a line and you break your father's spine." The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out "OW MY SPINE!" The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.

We're skipping April Fools' Day this year. The biggest joke is already sitting in office running our country.