INS jokes

When the US Army found Chinese soldiers selling secrets to China, they said, "Looks like we have some chinks in our armor."

Why does the Queen have more mobility than the King in chess?

Because it's shaped like the kitchen floor.

Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?

They all shoot people for a living.

Hear about the guy who dipped his nuts in glitter?

Pretty nuts!

While an unsuspecting father's at the office making money, this 18 year old son will spend his day in mother's cunny.

We're at the breakfast table, father eats and takes his calls, he doesn't know my mother's toes are kneading at my balls.

Santa decided coal was too expensive, so he started putting shredded lettuce and mayo in naughty kid's lockers... he calls it the coal's law.

This morning I was beaten up by a busty woman in an elevator.

I was staring at boobs, and she said, "Press One?"

So I did...

I don't remember much after that.

Let's try to get to either max likes or dislikes, your choice.

And duck jokes, who would win in a fight, a baby or a pacifist, presented by duck?

I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.

Explain bear still lives in his mother's basement.

My mom told me yesterday that in this Valentine, we should take our love to new heights. So tomorrow I'm prepared to fuck her in "The Hot Seat" position.

You really put the R in special.

A man accidentally elbows a woman's boob as she is standing behind him in a hotel lobby. The man apologizes profusely and says, "If your heart is as soft as your breasts, I know you'll forgive me."

To which the woman replied, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 318."

The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.

The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.

At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me.

On a related note, I suck at darts.

Are you interested in it?

More than two boot branches.

Is it so? Do people get freedom?

Omega was born with Mammosbum in Mammam.

My principal called my mom at school and said, "You should teach your son well." After coming back home, at first she taught me sex!

Looking in the mirror, I don’t need a therapist, god damn, I wanna be a terrorist.

How many East Asians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Tu.