INS jokes

Your hairline is so far back my grandpa said he had a glimpse of it in the 1960s.

When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.

Two guys were beating up someone in an alley, so I stepped in to help.

He didn't stand a chance against the three of us.

All these 9/11 jokes need to stop.

My uncle died in 9/11. At least he died doing what he loves: flying planes.

Your hairline looks like it got burnt in the Civil War.

What do you call a person in a wheelchair?

Anything they can't catch you.

What do you call a teacher who never farts in public? A private tutor.

Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends?

Well, honestly, he’s a real pain in the neck.

What do you call a monkey in a minefield?

A baboom.

Who knows? Maybe the end of the world will be made in China too.

A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.

Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?

They're the ones that make the toys.

So, a mom and a dad are having sex. Their daughter comes down and says, "Mommy, Mommy, what are you doing?"

The mom goes, "Uh, we're making a cake. Let's go back to bed." So she tucks her daughter in and says, "We will go to the park tomorrow."

So the next day they go to the park, and two teens are going at it in some bushes, and the little girl goes, "Mommy, Mommy, what are they doing?" And the mom goes, "They're making a cake. Let's go back home."

So they go home, and the mom tucked her into bed and says, "Tomorrow we will go to the zoo." And so the next day they go to the zoo, and two monkeys are going at it, and the girl goes, "Mommy, what are they doing?" And the mom goes, "They're making a cake. Let's go back home."

And so they go home, and the girl goes, "Mommy, did you and Daddy make a cake last night?" And the mom nervously says, "N-no, why?" And the little girl goes, "Because I licked the icing off the couch."

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

Neither of 'em can see their parents.

There is a country in Africa. It's called Djibouti. It has a crack in it!

Your forehead is so big, I bet your dreams are in IMAX.

Your hairline so bad that when your teacher puts you to sit in the front of the class, your hairline be all the way in the back.

What do you call an Indian in a Lamborghini?

Curry in a hurry.

I don't wanna brag, but I finished a puzzle in under a week, and it said 2-4 years on the box.

What do emos and guys with a durag have in common? They both have waves, just one is on their arm.