Im Jokes

Are you a toaster? 'Cause I wanna take a bath with you.

Are you a knife? 'Cause you make me wanna KMS.

Are you a painting? 'Cause I hang you.

Are you the flu? 'Cause you make me wanna hurl.

Are you a newspaper? 'Cause you have new problems every day.

Are you the ground? 'Cause I'm six feet deep in you ;)

"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it is too cheesy."

"YOU MORON ITS *TOO* not TO, IM GOING TO EAT YOU ALIVE AND RIP OUT YOUR PROSTATE"

Me: Gay puns are the best!

Also me: But I'm straight though.

A Mexican is drunk and he has a passenger in the car, and the passenger asked, "Where are we going?"

The Mexican says, "I'm not driving, the drunk guy is."

Guys, if y'all don't stop making hatred stuff, I'm contacting admin.

Im willing to sacrifice

A picture of Lord Farquaad from Shrek with his arms outspread, as if giving a speech. The text on top of the image says: "Me sharing slightly offensive memes:". Below the picture is the text "Some of you may die, but it is a sacrifice I'm willing to make."

Son: Hey, Dad, why is my name Dick?

Dad: Oh, because a dick fell on you when you were born.

Son: Ohhhhh, so that's why I'm gay.

I'm psychicking your butt.

I find this website. I see this person named Gwen. I simp for her, but just for a troll. Next thing I know, we're somehow dating? Then her ex comes in and dates her again. Apparently, he is gay, and I'm pretty sure Gwen could be a boy, but he or she has 3 friends who always back her up, just to let y'all know this isn't really supposed to be a dating app or drama app, it's a joke app, and this isn't really a joke. But one last thing, you guys are all b*tches...

Sub to Hi, I'm Chiranjay!

I was going to tell a joke about a mirror, but it seems that I'm looking at one.

Stop making these stop jokes. I'm running out of laugh gas.

I'm about to say this but.....

*whentheimposterissus*

What happens if you put your hand in glue? Your hand will stay there forever! I'm joking, hahaha!

An orphan goes into a bar, and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you need parent permission to enter."

Llama: Hey sheep, let's play cards.

Sheep: Llama, fuck off!!

Llama: What's your damn problem?

Sheep: Nothing, I'm just having a Baahd day, okay dick head?

HEY D.K. date ME, not that weirdo Freshfry! I LOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVEEEEEE UUUUUUUUUUU D.K. Let's DATE! I'm 13 ;)

I'm back, bitches!

Alright ALYA and drew ALYA's boyfriend!! Have a good fucking life, I hardly even think drew is real but uk whatever I've passed on but DREW if u fucking wanna beef, I'll fight u bro, ur prob a stick, I'm fucking doing push ups 4 times a week 100 each.