How Many Jokes

How many white women does it take to change a lightbulb? One. To hire the Mexicans.

Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun? Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.

How many people does it take to wash the dishes? Only Juan

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? It only takes one but it takes a long time and the light bulb has to want to change.

how many russians does it take to change a light bulb. I don't know they just keep Putin them in.

How many ears does Captain Picard have? -- Three: A left ear, a right ear and a final front ear.

Time for a story: There are 500 bricks on a plane, one falls off. How many are left? 499.

What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator? Open fridge, put in elephant, close fridge.

What are the 4 steps to putting a giraffe in a fridge? Open fridge, take out elephant, put in giraffe, close fridge.

The lion king is having a birthday party. All the animals attend except one, who is it? Giraffe, he's stuck in the fridge.

Sally wants to cross an alligator infested river. There is no bridge and the only way she can get across is by swimming. She swims across safely, how? The alligators where at the birthday party.

Sally dies anyway. How? She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

How many dead baby's does it take to change a light bulb?

Well It's not 8 because my basement is still dark

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb.

None, because they beat the room for being dark, then arrest the room for being broke.

Little Johnny and his teacher were telling each other jokes and riddles, His teacher asked "Three birds where sitting on a wire, a hunter shot one. How many are left?" Little Johnny replied "None, because the sound would scare the other two away." His teacher said "No, but I like the way you think!" Little Johnny replied, "Alright, now I have one for you. What goes in dry and hard and comes out soft and hard?" His teacher was shocked and said "Little Johnny!" He replied "It's gum! But I like the way you think!"

How many time does it take to cook a baby in a microwave?

I don’t know, I can’t count while masturbating

there are 5 cats on a boat and 1 jumps off. how many are left?- 0 they were copy cats

Why do American guns only have 30 bullets? cuz thats how many kids are in a class

How many times do yo tickle a squid before it laughs???

TEN-TICKLES

How many genders are there? One, women are property.

How many wives does Santa have? Hoe Hoe Hoe

How many women does it take to change a light bulb? none they cant change anything

how many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb... none they cant change anything I am just kidding you know gay jokes aren't funny cum on guys.