I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had I said “yes”
“Poor old fool,” thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink. The gentleman asked, “So how many have you caught today?
”The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How many kids does it take to paint a wall ?
Depends on how hard u throw them 😂😂😂😂
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How many times can u subtract 10 from 100? Once. The Next Time you would be subtracting 10 from 90
There are 50 dogs and 48 cats. How many are hungry?
A.10
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The colour orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'seperate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, its a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb? “You’re telling me there’s change in a lightbulb?”
How many fingers does the Dragonborn have?
Four fingers and a Thu'um.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles.
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun? Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How many people does it take to wash the dishes? Only Juan
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets? That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today? Person 2: “Seven” Person: 1: “What the fuck dude..” Person 2: “I know right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.” (Based on an encounter I had recently)
How many times does 50 fit into 9 Get in a van and find out
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bolin ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though al research that
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? It only takes one but it takes a long time and the light bulb has to want to change.
how many russians does it take to change a light bulb. I don't know they just keep Putin them in.
