How Are You

How Are You jokes

Sex

  • Y'uree: Bruh... listen... gangbang... sex... the same.

    Halyei: Hello Y'uree and Jarod. How are you guys today?

    Y'uree: Well, sexy girls like you should be ass-fucked or fucked so hard that all you can do is talk or nothing at all?

    Halyei: Thank you, I suck dicks too!

    Jarod: Are you Breya???

    Halyei: No... do I look like that flying bastard???

    Jarod: Ugh... no... baby, you're free to go!

    Halyei: Sorry, I miss cursing and having sex with her too! Sorry for being an idiot. I really miss her. Maybe you and I can give her a threesome??? No, I'm not gay! WHY!!!!!!! Can you come to the please fuck me! It's the fuckable girls contest and I want to win! Sorry!

  • 4
  • Rape

  • Gwen: Hi sir, how are you?

    Tj: Good... you?

    Gwen: I am super duper good! And where is your date? It seems like you need one πŸ˜‰!

    Tj: 😏.

    Gwen: Here, this is your guest hall pass...you may...come in my friend!

    Tj: Thanks but um, don't you think you should be um getting inside too?

    Gwen: πŸ™ No thanks sir but I have to work...I am the staff so bye! 😁.

    Tj: NO!!!!!!

    1 day later.

    Gwen: πŸ€•πŸ€•πŸ€•πŸ€•πŸ€•πŸ€•πŸ€°πŸ€°πŸ€°πŸ‘©β€πŸ‘§β€πŸ‘¦

    Friend

  • My friend: How are you running so fast? You just had 10 hamburgers!

    Me: It’s the 10 hamburgers that are making me run fast!

    Day

  • Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today and tomorrow. I have to go home from home and walk home. Walk and a bike. Walk, walk, and a bike to school tomorrow night. I have to have lunch with my mom and dad, and I have dinner with you tonight.

    Anxiety

  • Friend: How's it going?

    Me: Good, things are good!

    Parent: How are you?

    Me: Oh, I'm fine!

    Twitter: Compose new tweet?

    Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.

  • 3
  • Guy

  • I was 11 or 12 at the time.

    Guy (passing me): "How are you doing?" Me, an autist: "Pretty bad honestly." Guy (continued walking past me) Me: ...

    If you didn’t know, β€œwhat’s up” and β€œhow are you doing” are phatic expressions in the United States, meaning that they’re said as greetings even though they literally mean something else.

  • 6
  • Stranger

  • *Chatting with a stranger on the internet*

    Me: Hi, how are you?

    A stranger: I'm fine, hbu?

    Me: I'm good. πŸ€·β€β™‚οΈ

    Cop

  • Officer: Hi, how high are you?

    Pothead: No officer, it's "how are you?"

    Officer: Oh, I'm sorry, I've been high since last night.

    Pothead: Cool, I'd like to give you some weed, happy 420, sir.

    Officer: Omg, thanks man, appreciate that.

  • 0
  • Dad

  • Hi, how are you? Busy doing right? I just texted. Me and my dad were going out and walk home and walk walk home from school and walk home from home and walk home and walk walk home, and I will get back with him tomorrow morning.

    Time

  • Say hi to outer space. Hi, now say how are you doing to the moon. Hi, how are you doing? Why are you wasting your time? XD lol

    Water

  • I was making holy water, and my girlfriend walked in, saying, "What are you doing?"

    I said, "Making holy water."

    She said, "How are you making holy water?"

    I'm boiling the hell out of it.

  • 1