Hotness jokes

What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.

What did the hot dog say to the condom? "Hot dog condom style."

Two women, Jane and Emma, are in the afterlife waiting for judgement.

Emma turns to Jane and says, "I'm just curious, but how did you die?"

Jane replies with, "I burnt to death."

Emma, shocked, responds with, "That sounds horrible! What was it like?"

Jane answers with, "It first felt really hot and painful, but then I felt nothing. How did you die?"

Emma replies with, "Well, I believed my husband was cheating on me. I decided to leave work early one day to make sure he was loyal. I found him on the phone with his mother. I thought he was hiding something from me so I ran to the bedroom and found nothing. Then I sprinted to the kitchen and didn't find anything. I then jolted outside to the backyard and just found that he hadn't cleaned the pool. I was so tired from running that I fell over into the pool and drowned."

Jane retorts with, "Well if you checked the oven neither of us would be here right now."

Me and my friends were having a party the other day when some bitch came bitching about the noise. Thankfully, she was hot and had a nice ass, so it was enjoyable raping her.

The next day when I woke up, I found her body only half eaten. Her lower body was still intact, so I went for seconds to fuck off the hangover. Then I had breakfast. Her ass tasted good with some ketchup.

Hot shingles in your neighborhood wanting to get nailed.

I feel sad because I went to an old man in a wheelchair while he was sitting next to a fire, and I screamed, "Hot Wheels!" 🤣

Are you a volcano? Because you're hot and I really lava you!

Three men were in a desert. One man was holding a jug, the 2nd was holding a paper bag, and the last was holding a car door. A man came around and asked the 1st why he had a jug. He said it was his water and if he got thirsty, he would take a drink.

Then he asked the second why do you have a paper bag? The guy said this is my packed lunch, so if I get hungry, I will eat my lunch.

Then he asked the last man why he has a car door and he said if he got hot he would roll down the window.

Like if you think oily men are hot.

What did the sun say to the Earth?

"Am I hot?"

What is the difference between me and a fire?

It's hot.

Yo mama so fat, she could fly a hot air balloon by letting out her gas.

I'm not saying I'm ugly...

But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.

My friend was in a wheelchair, so I rolled him in fire. Now I call him Hot Wheels.

What is it called when someone is a wheel chair and in a fire?

Answer: Hot wheels...

Killua is hot, why?

He's gay.

Mpreg is hot af.

I love jacking off to mpreg.

The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was flaming hot wings.

Which is faster, hot or cold?

Hot, because you can catch cold.

How do you know when you have been invited to a gay barbecue?

When you are unable to distinguish foot-long hot dogs from long and thick big dicks, regardless of skin color.