Hooker jokes
My ex died in an anchorage accident.
She always was a sleeping hooker.
Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?
Not only do you get your money back, but the second hour is free.
What's the difference between the woods and a hooker?
Some hookers have passions for nature. Other hookers will Kill ThEIR Tricks for payback!!!!!!
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.
What do you call a dead hooker?
It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.
What do hookers and porn stars have in common? They get paid for sex and get STD's.
What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast? A Sandy Hooker
What’s the difference between Jesus and a hooker?
The look on their face when you're nailing them.
So my dad walks into a bar and there was a hooker and a child. I was with him and they both approached us and they said only £50 for head but it was a little weird that the child was talking to my dad and the hooker was talking to me. I was about to say something but my dad pushed me over and my friend's uncle killed my dad.
The kid was never seen again. Her name was Madeleine McCann. I think I'm the only one who knows where she is, but overall the head from the hooker was good.
What's the best thing about a dead hooker? Refunds.
Kenney lost his virginity to a $10 hooker, but he only had to pay $5. She was his sister, so he got the family discount.
What kind of person will steal Captain Hook's hook?
Answer: A hooker.
What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?
I've been raped!
What's the difference between a club and a bar? I can only get dead hookers from the club alleyways.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
What's the difference between a dead hooker and a watermelon?
The watermelon didn't scream when I sliced it.
I once asked a sketchy man at a bar for some relationship advice. He simply replied, "They're all dead hookers once they're in the trunk."
What’s the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One kneels for salvation.
The other kneels with salivation.
Why can't you kill a hooker?
Because they're dead inside anyway.
Who remembers when ‘tweeting’ meant “stabbing a hooker”?