Hooker jokes
What does a hooker and butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
What do both a hooker and a customer have in common? They come onto each other.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.
My ex died in an anchorage accident.
She always was a sleeping hooker.
Q: What do Moses and hookers have in common?
A: They've dealt with a burning bush.
What do hookers and porn stars have in common? They get paid for sex and get STD's.
What’s the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One kneels for salvation.
The other kneels with salivation.
What's the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One is glowing and the other is blowing.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One reads, the other breeds.
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
What's the difference between a dead hooker and an onion?
I don't cry when I'm cutting up a dead hooker.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
What do you call a dead hooker?
It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.
Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?
Not only do you get your money back, but the second hour is free.
What did the leper say to the hooker? "You can keep the tip."
A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?
P2: I don't know.
P1: Wow, you sick fuck!
Why do orphans become hookers?
'Cause they can call someone "daddy."