Hooker jokes
How do you know the hooker killed herself?
She sniffed the line off the dresser you said not to touch.
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
What's the difference between an onion and a hooker?
I cry when I chop up onions.
What's the difference between the woods and a hooker?
Some hookers have passions for nature. Other hookers will Kill ThEIR Tricks for payback!!!!!!
This ole boy picked up a hooker one time and she gave him the clap. In a few days, he saw her again, and he went up to her and said, "Hey, you gave me the clap!" She said, "NO I DID NOT! I sold it to ya!"
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.
What's the difference between a screw and a hooker? You can't unscrew the hooker.
What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.
How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.
How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.
What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"
What's the difference between my car and a hooker? I park my car in a garage instead of leaving it on the side of the road.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a hooker?
The look on their face when you're nailing them.
Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.
A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.
"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"
"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."
What's the best thing about a dead hooker? Refunds.
What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?
I've been raped!
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?
A Sandy Hooker
Why can't you kill a hooker?
Because they're dead inside anyway.
What does a hooker and butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.