Hooker jokes
They said I was depressed, I should make an effort to do what I love.
I had to pay a hooker for twelve hours work.
... I felt nothing, but it was nice, being with someone who felt the same.
How are Xbox servers like hookers? First they take my money, and then they go down on me.
What is the difference between a hooker and a feminist?
If you want a hooker to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
What's the difference between homework and a hooker? They both start with an "H", but we all know which one we would like to do.
This ole boy picked up this hooker and was getting some head driving down the road, and she started gagging on it a little, and he said, "Oh yeah baby, you like that big dick, don't ya?" and she said, "Oh baby, it's not that, ya asshole stinks!"
What's the best part about a dead hooker? The second hour is free!
What’s the difference between a hooker and a cat?
I haven’t banged a hooker.
The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.
What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.
How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.
How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.
What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"
Q: What do hookers and kittens have in common?
A: They both get dumped on deserted back roads.
Q: How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Not three. My damn basement is still dark...
What can happen if you bring a hooker into a stranger's house? He will ask you, "Really, are you nuts?"
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One reads, the other breeds.
Q. What do you call a hooker in a vegetative state? A. A thot incapable of thought.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
When you find out the stripper you're banging is a hooker, but you're saving money, so it's okay.
What's the difference between an onion and a hooker?
I cry when I chop up onions.
My ex died in an anchorage accident.
She always was a sleeping hooker.