Hit jokes

If a person in a wheelchair runs you over, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"

I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger, then it hit me.

So, my mom has hit me with a flip flop when I was bad, and when I cheated on my girl, right when the other girl came in, a flip flop came flying in the room.

A ball hit me in the vagina.

I wondered why the pitcher hadn’t pitched the ball yet.

Then it hit me.

I'm like a rubber because people hit me as I can't feel.

The whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting "Remind me later" on his Windows Updates.

So a blond and a brunette jumped out of a plane. Who hit the ground first?

The blond because she had to ask for directions.

When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?

"Dumbest7" is my Xbox account. Hit me up.

Why didn't Sally get home from work?

She got hit by a bus.

Boy: Why is my sister named Rose?

Dad: Someone threw a rose out of a car and it hit her in the head.

Boy: Okay, Dad.

Dad: No problem, Brick.

My ex misses me, good thing she'll never hit me.

When you're going 80 mph and hit a speed bump,

Then the speed bump starts screaming.

A man and a cow are stuck on train tracks, and there is a train in the distance about to hit both of them. A vegan sees this and tries to help. Who does he save, the man or the cow?

Neither. He isn't strong enough to lift either of them.

When earthquakes hit, coffins become maracas underground.

My girlfriend said, "GIMME EIGHT INCHES AND MAKE IT HURT!"

So I pumped my dick in her 4 times and hit her in the head with a brick.

Why did I walk across the road?

To get hit by a car.

Why did the dog cross the road?

It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.