Hes jokes
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He hit Alt+F4.
Why did people say a man had nothing? ... Because he was a-nonymous.
A shop assistant is helping a little boy who can't find his mum in the supermarket.
He asks the boy, "What's she like?"
The boy says, "Big Cocks and vodka!"
Why did the alligator see a crocodile?
Because it ate too many humans, and he was sick.
Why did the adopted kid eat the last cookie? Because he was the only one left to adopt; everyone hated him.
Memes
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because he can’t find home plate.
Zozo the hobo has two frogs and a bunny cage from pet expo. Why? Because he wanted a pet, you idiot!
Why were people sad when John F. Kennedy got shot? All he got was head.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the wall.
Hey, did you know that Stephen Hawking predicted the end of the world?
Well, not really. He predicted the end of *his* world.
Why did Stephen Hawking die when he logged onto Facebook?
It took all his info!
Why did the Duck go to rehab?
Because he was a Quackhead.
I asked my zombie boyfriend, "Does he have a brain?" Because he's stupid asf.
Why doesn't Santa have kids? Because he only comes once a year.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream?
He was hit by an ice cream truck.
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.
I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
Oh, don’t worry, he’s okay now.
But the vet charged me six quid.
Why is Goofy named Goofy? Because he is goofy!
Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
He drove too far away from the wall, and the cord unplugged.