Hes jokes
Why did the adopted kid eat the last cookie? Because he was the only one left to adopt; everyone hated him.
Why did the baby cross the road? Because he wanted to die.
What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves!
Just kidding, he hasn’t opened it yet.
You know how Stephen is smart, which class did he skip?
Leg day.
I asked my zombie boyfriend, "Does he have a brain?" Because he's stupid asf.
Memes
I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
Oh, don’t worry, he’s okay now.
But the vet charged me six quid.
Why is Goofy named Goofy? Because he is goofy!
Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
He drove too far away from the wall, and the cord unplugged.
He tried to install a free version of Windows 10.
If you're ever bored, jump on Vedanta, what is he going to do, tell his parents? (He probably will.)
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.
What did the dog say when he came home from a long shift at work? Today was ruff.
Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream?
Because he was dead.
Why is Santa make-believe?
Because he is fake!
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
If a kid does not go to sleep during nap time, isn't he resisting a rest?
He's fat!
Why did Adolf Hitler wish he had two nuts?
Because he only had one.
Why did the rapper get lost in the music?
Because he couldn't find the beat.