I wonder if Stephen Hawking has ever watched Avengers: Endgame... Oh wait, he can't.
Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.
I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.
Trump is so orange that he makes the oompa loompa's look white.
I bought my friend a rope for his birthday he said it was the most violent book ever
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient.
The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient."
Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants.
Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage.
After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control.
Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?"
The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
One day i told a kid what 2 x 12 was he said he didn't know i said lets go to my basement and figure it out he is still in my basement trying to do the equation
Before my grandad died, he whispered to me, "Is your uncle still in the basement?" I said he has died. Oh, my grandad said, "I will lock him in heaven's basement."
My brother got his legs chopped off, but someone FBI opened my basement door, but it wasn't my brother because he died of starvation in the basement.
my bother went missing 5 years ago he also supported TRUMP he is currently dead in my basement in a chest in a cupboard
My builder was extending my basment when he questioned me because he found three ded kids n a corner tied together
A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious he ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over they asked what happened and the German soldier said hail hit her
I don’t like making jokes about 9/11. My grandad died in it, he was the greatest pilot I ever knew.
A man who thinks he's funny but is actually a transvestite/transformer.
he never has a bad day cuz he wakes up on both side of the bed
he never has a bad day
because he always wake’s up on both sides on the bed
What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?
They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
I got my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. He came back a week later and said it was the most violent book he’s ever read.
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.
