Height jokes
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Perform fellatio.
Why did Sally fall dead?
Because she was on top of a tower and fell because she had no arms. Hahahahaha!
Why don't midgets use tampons?
Answer: They are always tripping over the string.
You're so short that you use a ladder to reach a dime.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass is tickling their ballsacks!
You're so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool because they're scared you'll drown in the kiddie pool.
You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice and dreams.
You’re so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.
You’re so short, you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
You're so short you could be drowned by heavy rains.
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
You’re so short, I bet you don’t have to bend to tie your shoelaces.
You're so short that you use a ladder to reach the potato chips!
You're so short that you don't have to open the front door to get inside the house.
Dwarf: pulls down the flap for the mirror.
Also dwarf: can’t see.
It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Why don't the giraffes go to elementary school? Because they are already in high school.
I remember my grandad's last words: "Are you still holding the ladder?"