Do you know a way to really freak out someone that works at a car dealership?
You say, "Tell me if you can hear me," then get in the trunk and start screaming.
Did you hear about the old Italian chef?? Yeah he pasta a way. Then a man walked comprehending to be him. Everyone knew he was a in-pasta
Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Timmy looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car." They continue on with their bath.
Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Susie looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car garage." They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, "hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage."
The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, "what's wrong?" Lil Susie says, "well Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn't fit so we cut them off."
I was fucking this girl, and I started to make her cry. She mumbled things and squirmed, but I couldnt hear her through the gag I put in her mouth.
Do you wanna hear a Gay Joke...
Butt fuck it
What to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it’s to chesesy
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.
When deaf people see someone yawning, do they think they're screaming?
There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted Roblox. One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury. One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignore it and continued to play Roblox. Chris's parents came and saw what had happened. The dad then yelled, "You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!" Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too.
johnny was watching TV when you hear them say bitch and bastards so he ask hes dad "what is a bitch and bastard." dad say "a bitch is a female and a bastard is a mail." then johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say ass and shit so he ask hes dad what shit and ass means dad says "a shit is shaving creme like what i'm putting on my face and ass is a coat why don't you bug your mom." so johnny goes back to the TV and then they say fuck so johnny ask his mom what fuck means mom says "fuck means carving like doing to the turkey then a few minutes later Johnny hears a knock on the door so he answers it he then says "welcome bitch and bastard may i tack your ass" the people then ask wear hes parents are johnny says "my dad is putting shit on hes face and my mom i fucking the turkey.
I hear coal mining is a rock-bottom job.
did you hear how Stephen Hawkings died he lost wifi conection
So you can't pay rent and you know your going to get evicted, but all of the sudden you hear a knock on your door and it's your landlord but he's naked and erect and on his cock, it says your rent is due.
Did you hear about the monkeys that share a amazon account?They where prime mates
Wanna hear a good joke?
My dad’s love for me
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?’
Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2015/11/26/the-ten-funniest-jokes-ever-according-to-science-5527698/?ito=cbshare
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You want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. You want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. You want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was the next door neighbor.
wanna hear a pizza joke..?
nevermind its to cheesy
Me: Want to hear a joke? Friend: Sure Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me. Friend: What's funny about that? Me: Because the next day they disowned me.
Did you hear about the dead artist
Too many strokes
