Have jokes

My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"

Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!

Why use Heathrow when we have your forehead?

🦄🦄🦄🦄🦄🦄🦁🦁🦁🐩🐖🐒🐷🐵🐎+/;!¥/%? Fuckfuckfuuk of your own is also a joke about your relationship with Google and Twitter users who don't know what they think of their own personal life, and the way they have been involved since the last few years of debate is the only thing.

Have you heard about the kidnapping at the goat farm?

A: Do you eat food?

B: Yes...

A: You can sit on deez nuts then!

B: Omg I have depression now.

What do people have that orphans don't? A family.

Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.

How do you get an orphan sad?

You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.

Have you ever seen that weird ad that pops up at the bottom: sexy Russian babes looking for men older than 30, and they're 18, so is it a reverse pedo? Oh well.

A Roman guy walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "Can I have 5 beers please?"

What do pimps and farmers have in common?

They both need a hoe to stay in business.

Hi, I'm Claire. I am new to this website. I have been seeing these "Legends," and I've been tracking one specifically, watersharky. I have questions about him. Is he nice, protective, single? If anyone has any more information about him, please tell me.

People who don't have common sense are just stupid people with ugly hearts. STOP HATING PEOPLE YOU NEVER KNOW! Also write "then exit the f word site," and I think we know that won't happen!!!

I L.O.V.E GWEN!!!!!!

What do girls and toilet roll have in common?

They both deal with a lot of crap.

Why can't orphans tell jokes?

They have no one to tell them to, people.

A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."

What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"

What does a wife and a boombox have in common?

They only work when you beat them.

You have Chinged your last Chong.

Why does Job have an Area 51 head? Because his head is the shape of a 🦖.