Have jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
Why can’t orphans eat at a family restaurant? Because they don’t have a mom or dad.
Have you heard of deez nuts?
Teacher: Students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house.
Student one orphan: I don't have any.
Student 2: What is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner?
Student one orphan: What!
Student 2: The prisoner gets picked.
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
I have to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
Why are Americans so bad at chess?
Because they have already lost 2 towers!
Wait, since I'm underage from having sex, what is it like?
Peter: *curses*
Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?
Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.
Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!
Have you ever seen Helen Keller's dog?
Neither has she.
Me: Hey, Mom? Why do we celebrate birthdays?
Mom: Because that's the day a new life was born, and people are born every day so every day is a special day.
My thoughts: And my friend wonders why I have depression...
What type of bird does not have feathers on itself?
A bald eagle.
Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?
An orphan can never get a call home from school because they don’t have a home to call.
An orphan walks on a path asking for his mum. Soon he remembers he doesn't have a mum.
(Also, I had sex with ur mum. She was screaming "daddy~")
If 2 vegetables have an argument, it's called beef.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
It didn't have the guts to do it.
MAN 1) Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
MAN 2) No.
MAN 1) Neither did he.
Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other, "What do you think about that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole."