Hang jokes
So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."
The emo kid tried to give me a handshake. Sadly, I left him hanging.
Don't ever try to give an emo kid a high five. They'll just leave you hanging.
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.
The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
Dammit, I hanged off their nose off.
What do you call two emos spending time together?
Hanging out.
A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."
The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"
U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.
U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.
Wanna suck my dick?
No? Well then I'm gonna go hang.
Met the emo kid today; he was pretty chill; he was just hanging out.
Are you a rope? Let's hang out by a tree and drink :)
Why are grapes never alone?
Because they hang out in a bunch!
My mom interrupted my gaming session to tell me to hang up the lights.
I hung something else instead.
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
When I was feeling suicidal, I called the suicide hotline and they left me hanging.
When a baby was born to a slave, did the slave owners hang a "Bred in Captivity" sign above the crib?
Hello, are you there?
Yes, who are you?
My name is Watt.
What’s your name?
Watt’s my name.
Yes, what is your name?
My name is John Watt.
John What?
Yes, are you Jones?
No, I’m Knott.
Will you tell me your name?
Will Knott.
Why not?
My name is Knott.
Not what?
Not Watt, Knott!
*hangs up*
Little Timmy is hanging out with Rapunzel, and he mentions Hugo and a few other characters from Varian And The Seven Kingdoms, and she responds with, “Who the frick are you talking about? Since I don’t know them, I got a surprise for you!” She wraps him up in Christmas wrapping paper labeled "For Eugene."
What do emos and a bird nest have in common?
They both hang from a tree.