New Guy Jokes - Page 12 - Worst Jokes Ever

I hope all of you had a great merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a good whatever you celebrate! I got so much this year, over $300 of fishing gear, a small 2011 coin mint collection, some coins from the Nazi party, a remote control car, 100 dollars, and more. Say what you guys got in the comments.

Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!

Me: hee hee egypt.

Jeff crosses the US border.

The second he crosses into the USA, a guy comes up with a gun.

Jeff: "That's what I was expecting."

What do you call Joe from Family Guy in an electric wheelchair?

RoboCop.

A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."

So I replied, "No, it doesn't."

Guys, stop joking about 9/11. It's just plane wrong.

These two guys were texting each other.

Guy 1: How are you?

Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*

Guy 1: ???

Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)

Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?

My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”

Jesus is the worst, just joking; he is the best! Best best BFF great guy ever that has a miracle. Jesus comes from Bethlehem! 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😇

My teacher gave me an A in Physics, then she tells me that it turns guys on.

A guy and his girl just finished making love.

Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"

The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"

Hey guys, it's Hailey here.

I'ma start off with henlo ;-;

I know you guys aren't going to believe me because of the assholes who were faking to be me, but if you can try to believe me, I'll explain.

So, Jake, we can't really be together anymore, since we no longer can chat. I'm so sorry.

Basically, my parents caught us on here as you realized. Yayyyy.

I don't have time to say anything else. So I've gotta go, but thankyou guys for everything you did for me.

Also, you won't get any response from me so yea. So sorry guys ;-;

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

What's the worst TV series for orphans?

Family Guy.

Guys, what do you call an un-aborted and parentless child?...

An orphan.

There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

Son said, "But I can't see."

Mom said, "That's the point."

What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)

It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.

What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?

Five Guys.

I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.

Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"