Guy jokes
Guys, stop joking about 9/11. It's just plane wrong.
Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy.
You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.
Join my beta communication community committee commission Cumbria, please guys and girls and gurls. It's all inclusive b&b.
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
Why did Dairy Queen and Burger King get arrested for copyright infringement? Because they gave birth to Five Guys.
What did the evil chicken lay? Deviled eggs! Get it guys? "Devil-ed" eggs! 😆
This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."
This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.
I met a gay guy last night.
Man, was he a pain in the ass.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that does comedy?
Sit down comedy.
Guy: Hi, how was your day today?
Woman: Good!
Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*
Guy: How many months pregnant are you?
Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.
You're the type of guy to have a whole training arc after a girl wants to fight you.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"
What do you call a guy with a sandwich?
A guy with a sandwich.
Bro sat down too close for comfort. I told him to move or he would get hurt.
Come on, how hard could it possibly be To move a few inches? You’re touching my D.
A guy really needs his personal space. Disobey and I’ll shove it in your face.