Guy Jokes

A Christian Missionary walks up to some people and says " Come! Meet Jesus!" One of the guys takes out a knife and says, "You first"

When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”.

Why can't all guys be more like Kenny? He doesn't get all upset when his mom isn't in the mood.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

The Wine Taster At An Old Vineyard Died. A Homeless Guy, Looking Ragged And Dirty, Came To Apply. He Persuaded The Manager To Give Him A Try. The guy was given a glass of wine. He swirled, smelled, sipped and spit. “It's a red wine, Merlot, three years old, grown on the South Slope and matured in oak barrels." He said. "Impressive," said the manager.

The man is given another. "Still a red wine, Cabernet, eight years old, from the Northeast slope, stored in a steel vats.”

The manager was amazed. He winked at his secretary. The secretary understood and brought out a glass of urine. The drunkard tasted it and said. "It's a blond, 27 years old, three months pregnant, and if I don't get this job, I'll tell who the father is!"

Why did the guy's birthday party stink?

Because he was turning farty!

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?" Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?" Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."

A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy "What's going on here!?" He exclaims. The wife replies "See, I told you he was stupid."

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What do u call 4 black guys and 2 white guys?

The Oreo Gane!

Guy: Whose place? Mine or yours? Girl: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

So a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex, when he gets to the bar he brags about the different sex positions they used and one of the guys says "oh did you do head" and he responded with no I couldn't find the head

Guy: "can I tell you a joke?" Spiderman: "yes" Guy: "you only have 11 months on your calendar" Spiderman: "why" Guy: holds up knife* "because I murdered May"

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!

(not original, but I forgot the source)

Guys help- i need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being fr rn guys help

I told a joke to a guy who had jumped off a bridge.... He was in bits 🤣🤦‍♂️

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Can anyone answer this riddle? Apparently this is the worlds hardest riddle! Good luck 😝- “I turn polar bears white and I will make you cry. I make guys have to pee and girls comb their hair. I make celebrities look stupid and normal people look like celebrities.”