Grass jokes
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
How do you make the grass cut itself?
Make it depressed.
Today was like every other day. It was so terribly long and so terribly dreary. I fear these feelings will never end. I’ll always feel so dark, feel so hopeless. Sometimes all I want is for it to end. For all of it to end, for all of my thoughts to end. I despise the way that always comes to mind. But I feel so lost, feel so hopeless. If something would just work. But nothing has worked. Nothing can fix this. These feelings will pass. These days won't feel so endless... or so absolutely heavy. Just give it some time. Just give it some hope... and some belief. The ‘happy pills’ will work. The doctor says they'll help... they'll help it go away. Just dump the pill in your hand. Let yourself place the little white thing on your tongue... Let yourself throw your head back and swallow. It'll make this better. It should make me feel better.
Everything has changed! The world is so bright— The world is so loud! I don’t know how I never noticed! The sun is so warm— The grass is so green! I feel so awake! I feel so content— I feel so happy! It’s so strange! I’m not anxious— I’m not overthinking! I guess those pills really worked! I think I’m really getting better— I think I’m really going to be happy!
What is green and blue?
Grass and the sky.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
What's the difference between a gamer and dog poop?
Dog poop touches grass.
What's the difference between cars and grass?
They both have wheels, except for the grass.
I named my grass emo, and it cut itself.
When the grass is bloody, You play in the mud...
Did you know that soccer fields aren't made of 4 million crayons? They are actually made from grass. :)
My Dad was mowing the grass today. I looked out the window and saw him slumped over the lawnmower. Apparently, he was just going through a rough patch.
What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.
Me: "Hey, you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong."
Trashy pig woman: "Why?"
Because you smell like fart, and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.
Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!
Why do people want emo grass? Because it'll cut itself.
What did the goat say?
"Let's play the grass!"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣funny joke yes
Just buy emo grass, then you will never have to mow your lawn again.
Roses are red.
Grass is green.
I think of you sucking my peen.
What do you call a cow eating grass?
A Lawn Moo-er.
What has fingernails and legs made of grass? You, I lied about the grass.