When the Boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What's worse than that? One's alive at the bottom. What's even worse than THAT? It eats it's way out. Wait it gets worse... It goes back for seconds. Just one more I swear... It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.
A Vampire goes to the Bakery:
Vampire🧛‍♂️: „One Bun please.“
Bäcker👩‍🍳: „But you're Vampire, don't you need blood 🩸 ?“
Vampir🧛‍♂️: „Yes, there is an accident outside and i need something to dip“
Your hairline goes so far back even Dora the Explorer couldn’t find it.
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money and he asks the bartender what's up with that jar of money bartender says you gotta do 3 task he takes the shot of Jack and the customer says what are the tasks he says the 1st one is but the 1st 1 is I got about a 12' gator in the back that's got a bad tooth and you gotta pull it he says all right what's the 2nd 1 he said I got a big old girl upstairs that aint had no loving in a long time you gotta make her smile he takes another shot of Jack he said all right what's the 3rd 1 he said you see that horse outside you gotta make him laugh and cry Guy goes upstairs goes out back comes out to the front comes back in the other customer said give him the jar The guy says I took care of that lady's tooth and I made that alligator smile well how'd you make the horse laugh he said easy i told him I had a bigger deck then him bartender says how did you make him cry he said easy I showed him
Or hair line goes way back before dinosaurs lived
I swallowed shampoo it goes blblblblb 🧼
How do you know when a football player has been to jail? When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.
It's supposed to say goes not goes
My friends man has seegures so goes who won their break dancing tournament
So In revenge of the sixth when Anakin goes and kills the younglings I thought to myself hey it’s just another day in an American school
What goes up and down and needs two people? A seesaw
The poacher agrees but says that his assistant is ill and will need the man to come with him in his assistant's place. The man agrees and so the poacher goes out to the jungle with the man.
The poacher brings a pair of handcuffs, a long stick, a shotgun and a dog. They search through the jungle for about an hour and then spot a male gorilla above in the treetops.
The man asks the poacher what the plan is. The poacher replies "I'm going to climb the tree and, when I get close enough, I'm going to start poking the gorilla with the stick until it falls out of the tree.
The dog is a specially trained dog. When the gorilla falls out of the tree, the dog will try to bite off the gorilla's balls. When the gorilla moves its hands to protect it's balls, you put the handcuffs on it."
This all seems to make sense to the man but he has one question. "What is the shotgun for?" he asks the poacher. The poacher responds: "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, shoot the dog."
Your hairline goes so far that even Gavin who looks like a monkey can’t see it!
What is the last thing that goes through a suicide bombers mind? His arse.
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: Do you have chocolate filled ice cream? The man replies: We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one? Johnny replies: Sure. After that the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later the man comes with a ice cream and Johnny's phone. Johnny asks: How much for the ice cream? The man replies: Nothing, its on the house. After Johnny ate hes delicious ice cream, he searched for hes watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
Your hairline and my car goes lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk
when i aim this trigger it all goes red do you have a bounty cos u got a m on your head
What is it called when a orphanes goes on vacation Answer: He's Making Family memories
