Go

Go jokes

Pikachu

    • "Police control! Have you been drinking?"

    "Go Pikachu! Thunder Clap!"

    "Did you just throw a hamster at my head?"

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    • Superman

    • Superman has been called to a huge house fire. Superman: "There you are ma'am, everyone out and all safe!" Mother: "But my children are still inside! You need to go back an--" Superman: "Ah fuck'em..."

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    • Baby

    • When you were born your mother said, "Oh, what a treasure!" Your father said, "Yeah, let’s go bury it."

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    • Go memes

    Milk

    • Little Johnny: Hey, Dad, are you finally back with the milk?

    Dad: Yea, but it's expired, so I'm going back to the "milk store" and get more (and not come back for a couple more years). :)

    Pilot

    • A blind pilot walks into a plane waving his walking stick.

    The passengers all look at each other in disbelief. The flight attendant gets on the PA and says,

    "Ladies and gentlemen, as you can see, the captain is legally blind, but rest assured, he is one of the best pilots in the world with over six thousand successful flights."

    Next the co-pilot makes his way to the plane, and he is also blind and uses his walking stick to make it to the cabin.

    The flight attendant gets on the PA and says,

    "Ladies and gentlemen, as you can see, the co-pilot is also blind, but rest assured, he is the second-best pilot in the world with over five thousand successful flights."

    At this point, the plane begins to take off from the runway. As it gains speed, the passengers grow tenser. The plane keeps accelerating more and more, and as it approaches the end of the runway, it still hasn't left the ground. The plane is approaching the end of the runway at high speed, and the passengers scream, "Oh my God, we're all going to die!"

    Suddenly, the plane takes off and begins its ascent.

    The pilot turns to the co-pilot and says, "The day they stop screaming, we're screwed."

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    • Dark Humor

    • Sometimes I think back on all the people I’ve lost and remember why I stopped being a tour guide.

    Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.

    You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.

    My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

    I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”

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    • Sex

    • Boyfriend: Let's go to bed.

    Girlfriend: No.

    Boyfriend: Why?

    Girlfriend: Because you want sex.

    Boyfriend: No, I don't.

    NEXT MINUTE

    The man could hear banging.

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    • Singer

    • Think of your favorite singer. Now, go ask someone what is your favorite singer. My favorite singer is Halsey, BTS. Now think about your least fave, mine is Oil London 😵. This is my home now.

    1. What rhymes with "oil"? Put it in da chat. Bye weird people!

    Blonde

    • There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”

    The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”

    The third blonde says “so we go at night.”

    Grandpa

    • One day Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking a cigar. Johnny said, "Can I have a puff?"

    Grandpa said, "Can your dick touch your ass?"

    Johnny said, "No, then that's your answer."

    Later that day, Johnny saw his grandpa drinking a drink. Johnny said, "Can I have a sip?"

    Grandpa said the same thing, "Can your dick touch your ass?"

    Johnny said, "No, then that's your answer."

    Later that night, Johnny was eating some cookies in the kitchen. Grandpa said, "Hi son, can I have a cookie?"

    Johnny said, "Can your dick touch your ass?"

    Grandpa said, "Yes."

    Johnny said, "Good, go fuck yourself!"

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