Gender jokes
Hippity Hoppity, women are property. (sans undertale)
She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.
I saw a homeless dude and gave him $1.
I saw a homeless woman and gave her $0.77.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
Why did the dumb blonde pee inside the condom?
Because the doctor told the dumb blonde that the dumb blonde was going to get a urine test!
Yeah, so why can't a blind woman drive?
Exactly, cuz she's a woman.
Two mums hook up!
Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"
The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!
What do you say to a ugly girl who claims to have been raped?
“Are you sure you didn’t rape him?”
A young Greek couple got married, and at their wedding...
...the mother of the bride took the bride aside for a quick chat.
"My sweet," she said, "you're now a woman. I'm so proud. Some advice for you now that you're married: Greek men are very particular, and at some point when you're making love to your new husband, he might suggest that you 'turn around,' if you know what I mean. If that sort of thing makes you uncomfortable, do not feel pressured to say yes."
The bride thanked her mother for the advice, and the wedding continued. That night, as she and her husband consummated the marriage, she was mildly surprised to learn that he never asked her to 'turn around.'
They spent a beautiful week together on their honeymoon and made love many times. But still, to her mild surprise, her husband never asked her to 'turn around.'
Their one year anniversary arrived, and they made love to celebrate the milestone. But again, to her mild surprise, the husband never asked her to 'turn around.' This continued for years: their second anniversary, third, fourth...
Finally, on their fifth anniversary, her husband started getting romantic with her in bed and said, "Honey, we've been married for five years. I was thinking we maybe try something new. I thought this time you could 'turn around,' if you know what I mean."
She replied, emphatically, "No! No, I do not do that, I am not that kind of woman!"
Without getting defensive, her husband simply said, "That's all well and good, honey. But I thought you said you wanted children?"
Why are there more female history teachers than male?
Because women like to bring up the past.
Life is like a penis.
Women make it hard.
What would Hitler be called if he abused women? Hither!
Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”
Repost
What did the blind man say as he passed the fish stand?
"Hello Ladies!"
What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?
They wait to be filled with a big load.
Why did the blonde have sex with the Mexican?
Because her teacher told her she had to do an essay.
I'm a nonbinary trash can.
I think the military shouldn’t allow trans people, because all they'd do is switch sides.
How do you put an end to MeToo? Just fill those combined showers with transgender women.
I hate it when people think I'm a boy because I have short hair. I mean, I'm gay, what do you expect?