GA jokes

Yo mama so fat, she could fly a hot air balloon by letting out her gas.

How do you get a Japanese fanclub?

Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!

I told a blonde she needed gas for her car, and she farted into the gas tank.

What do you call Hitler when he gets thrown?

A gas grenade.

Yo mama so fat, when she farts, it's counted as a new gas element.

The truth behind Hitler's suicide: his gas bill was too high.

This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"

Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.

Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.

What do alcoholics and gas prices have in common?

They both get really high.

What did Jessiey do?

Jump and make a explosionnnnnnnn, heyyyy gas!

I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.

Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish.

Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA

So, a guy walks into a gas station and walks to the person working and says, "Can I have a Kit Kat Chunky?" So she gets him one, and then he says, "No, I want a normal Kit Kat, you fat bitch!"

Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.

My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

Why was the fart on Kickstarter? He just needed some gas.

Why did the Jew get an electric car?

Because he was afraid of the gas.

What did the wizard say when he was filling up the gas tank? "Expensive Petroleum!"

If you're reading this, you are Nickel and Gallium......

Ni- ........*something else in between the two halves*................Ga

YOU FUCKING MONKEYS!

Talking about planets with my nephew.

He asked if you could plow thru Uranus because it's all gas.