If Hitler had a cooking channel: Step one... Turn on the gas.
Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?
Who else would think of adding gas?
Why did the noble gas cry?
Because all his friends Argon.
The average human male walks for five miles, but the gas station is ten miles away. So why does it take fifteen years for my dad to buy cigarettes?
Why did Hitler kill himself?
His gas bill was too high.
One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
An old woman goes to the doctor complaining of extremely smelly gas.
"I don't understand it, Doc," she said, "I have this terrible, terrible gas." "Thankfully," she added, "they are at least silent when I fart."
Doctor hands her a bottle of pills, tells her take them all and then come back to see him.
The old woman returned a short time later extremely mad. "I took those pills like you said and not only is my gas smelly, but now when I fart they are obnoxiously loud!", she yelled.
The doctor said, "well, now that we've solved your hearing problem, let's see what we can do about that gas".
Why didn't anyone react when the king farted? -- It was a noble gas.
Your mom is so fat that if she sits on top of a gas station, she will lower the prices.
Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.
So we were working with a new client at work, and my boss farts. He said, "A little gas never killed anyone."
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
Yo mama so dumb, she sold her car for gas money.
Yo mama so poor the ducks throw bread at her.
Yo mama so fat, when I swerved to miss her, I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to take Snoop Dogg for a walk.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to put Vin Diesel in her gas tank.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to mop the floor with Taylor Swift.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to ring Kristen Bell.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to skim Dwayne Johnson across a lake.
What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
He didn’t want to pay the gas bill.
Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw the gas bill.
How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?
Turn on the gas chamber.
What type of car did Hitler drive? A gas-guzzler.
