Q. why did the orphan rob a bank
A. to feel wanted for the first fucking time
What does 9/11 and covid-19 have in common? I couldn't give a fuck about either
Why do orphan like fucking other dads? Because they get to have a daddy.
Your forhead is so fucking big, i had to call an Uber to get accros the eyebrowes tillyour hair line.
ik its bad sowy
fuck all yall hoes
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it
boy; wanna hear about my dick? never mind it's too short. girl; wanna hear about my pussy? fuck no you won't get it.
If I fantasize about fucking a UCP Cabinet Minister Does that mean I'm sexually Conservative?
so there was this girl on the street that had no arms or legs that said hey sir i've never been fucked before will you do the honors and fuck me, so I threw her in the ocean and said well your fucked now.
What did satin say to god??
Bitch what the fuck you looking at
Penaldo song 🎵🎵🎵
He has conquered all the Farmers He is never going to stop From Lithuania down to Andorra He has scored a fucking lot Penalties and Tapins The Fields of Faroe Islands He is our GOAT And his name is Cristiano Columbus Allez, Allez, Allez Allez, Allez, Allez
--> I only have 4 moods:
• fuck this • fuck that • fuck me • fuck you
--> I empathize with the above, but I have an additional 4 moods to add:
• fuck yeah • fuck no • fuck my life • fuck everything
--> and don't forget the inevitable
• fuck it
-->and for those who have just given up
• fuck
This is beautiful
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride she says BOO! What kind of sick fuck does that?
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride she says BOO! What kind of a dick fuck does that!
Roses are dead, voilet smell poo, i got a big fucking shot gun, qhat you gona do
What did the blender say to the orange juice? What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid shut the fuck up.
How do fuck a really fat chick? Roll her in flour and look for the wet spot
What did the iceberg say to the titanic?Go fuck yourself....at the bottom of the sea.
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
I've got not much of anything to be honest Been in special classes in school Not liked by people Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me 31 years old and never had sex pathetic Not very smart Don't look good Hate myself more than anything Been a failure at everything in life Probably be alone forever People treat me like crap Can't do anything right And the list goes on and on
So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet the answer is ,I forget I'm a extreme procrastinator keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway
