Fruit jokes
What’s the difference between Apple and orphans?
Apples actually get picked.
What do you call a clown that is allergic to strawberries?
...Ollie the clown!
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple got picked.
Why didn't the orange go to the doctor?
Because he had vitamin C.
What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?
A jammy cunt.
If you are a banana, why don't you eat a banana?
Oh right, you'd be a cannibal. I mean a banan-i-ball.
What did an orange say the day before going to work?
"Back to the rind!"
Orange you glad to see me?
What is the postman's favorite fruit?
Water-mail-on.
Up your butt with a coconut!
Why do melons always have big weddings?
Because they cantaloupe!
What’s the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is fun to smash and one is a watermelon.
What do you get when you combine a planet and an apple?
Mario.
Why did the tangerine copy off other people's work?
Because the tangerine was unORANGEinal!
I am a fruitcake. Why? Because I’m fruity and nutty. That’s the joke. Tada!
What is a fish's favorite fruit/vegetable?
An avacodo.
What is a fruit's favorite way to call someone?
WhatsApple.
What do you call a banana driving a car?
A banana car.
My sis said only garlic and onions can make you cry.
So I threw an orange at her.
Q: Why did the boy not eat the banana?
A: He was scared the juice might come out.