What do you call a fish with no tail? A one-eyed grape.
Fruit Jokes
I saw a cat. It said, "Raisin" when he saw a nut. Hahaha, I am a crappy joker. Put me in the nerd club.
What do oranges π sweat?
Juice!
What do tomatoes π do when they meet?
They ketchup.
Knock knock.
Whoβs there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes! π π
What's the difference between a bicycle?
A banana, because vests don't have sleeves.
"Orange, orange, orange."
"Knock, knock."
"Orange."
"Orange you happy I didn't say orange again?"
What is an orange?
World's only not rhyming thing. Hehhhehehehehhe.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
"Breathe... Breathe..."
Three men were captured by a tribe and tortured. The leader of the tribe tells them that they would live only if they could achieve one thing: They had to go out and find 10 pieces of the same fruit each.
The first person returned with apples. The leader said that he had to put all 10 of them up into his ass without making a sound, or he would be killed. 1... 2... he screamed.
The next person came back with grapes. 1, 2, 3, he counted up to 8, but began to burst out laughing; he was killed. In heaven, the first man asked him why he laughed if he was doing so well. "Well, I saw the third guy coming back with fucking pineapples!"
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Orange." "Orange who?" "Orange you coming?"
What do you call a pineapple? P.P.A.P. LOLLLLOLOLOLLOL9LOOLKOK.
Knock knock.
Whoβs there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to the movies tonight?
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
What is the healthiest fruit?
An orange πβIt takes Vitamin See!
What did the banana say to his neighbor? Yellow!
What do depressed people and Apple's have in common?
They both hang from trees.
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.
What do lemons π wear in the rain?
Yellow jackets.
Why donβt oranges π go around blind?
Because they take Vitamin See!