Friends Jokes

Hi! Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been so busy!!!! I miss y'all, though!

My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.

He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."

A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend says, "Where is your girlfriend?" The guy says, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week."

When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"

Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."

And the other friend says, "Butt he is."

Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.

My friend wasn't open to the idea of me becoming a nudist.

I told him to stop being so clothes-minded.

God creates dog.

God: "You are man's best friend."

Dog: "That's pretty sexist."

God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"

Dog: "....."

God: "And chocolate kills you!"

Dog: "🐶"