Fixture Jokes

Blonde

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

5

4 to turn the table, and 1 to hold the bulb.

Chandelier

What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?

One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.

Baby

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

Well, it's not 8 because my basement is still dark.

Light

Today I'm attaching a light to the ceiling, but I'm afraid I'll probably screw it up.

Toilet

How did the toilet react when it received a gift?

That was so pot full (thoughtful)!

Rope

Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?

Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. 💀😈

Kid

How do you surprise a blind kid?

Put a plunger in the toilet.