Find jokes
Your hairline is so big, I couldn't find the area of it on Jupiter.
So the teacher goes up to you and says, "I'm going to call your parents." Me: "Good luck finding them."
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
Alright kids! Find a good place to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.
Clarie: I don't even care if it was a joke he made on me, you and Karlen, and if you think I'm getting over it, then you must have an oatmeal for a brain.
Jordan: Clarie ... you are so sensitive when she tells a little joke about you, me, and Karlen.
Clarie: It was painful!
Jordan: Who cares? I laughed. Ben is not a bad person, okay, calm down.
Clarie: Ben is a bad person. We are making friends with a bully/thug, but you say that he is not a "bad person", my mom is going to kill me if she finds out that I am hanging out with those kinds of people!
Jordan: Then don't tell her! Listen, I need you, give Ben a chance! Please?
Clarie: Shush, Karlen is coming!
Karlen: Hey guys, that Ben guy for sure has a way of saying words, I wish I could hurt him!!
Are you a banana...
because I find you a-peeling!
How to be a hero.
1. Tie a noose in your front yard.
2. Find and capture a furry.
3. Hang that furry because they deserve it.
It’s easy as 1-2-3!
Susie was in her mother's room one night, as her mother was getting ready for bed. She had slipped off her blouse; her boobs, plum and perky. Susie had asked what are those and will I get them? Her mother had said they were boobs and she would grow some in a few years. Her mother told Susie to find her father and say goodnight.
So Susie left, headed down the hall to the bathroom where her father was showering. Susie knocked on the door, he said come in. He had moved the shower curtain over just a bit. Susie said she loved him, and then seen her father's dick. Shocked, Susie asked her father what that was and if she would get one. Her father said it was a dick, and he said Susie would get it after her mother went to bed.
When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die, but he remembers the time you gave him a pen.
The Trump cocktail. Take a large glass and fill it with an ounce of everything behind the bar. Top it with whipped cream and a cherry. Now for the hard part: finding a Mexican to pay for it.
What store can an orphan never find?
Home Depot.
Why do kids want to become cops? They want to find the guy who touched them.
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
It's only rape.
If she finds out.
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
Why can you never find a virgin cow on a field with no bulls for miles? Just ask the redneck farmer.
Husband: Hey, my dear, this lunch is great. Where did you find the recipe?
Wife: In a detective novel.
You might find this joke a rib-tickler, but I sure do.
Your hairline is so far back even The Rock Johnson couldn't find it.