Finance jokes
So a lady came up to me today at the bank, and she asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
Yo, Bloon... what bitch where the fuck my child support camo Bloon? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
A: She looks good when she opens her hair. 😮
B: You will look good when you open your wallet. 👛
At school in a classroom, the teacher asked the kid, “If you have one dollar and your parents give you five dollars, how much do you have?” Everyone raised their hand except one little girl.
How did the guys with Down syndrome split the dinner bill? They all made a down payment.
A teacher says, "If you have one dollar and your parents give you 5 dollars, how much do you have?"
Everyone raised their hands except for a little girl in the front, but the teacher called on her anyway.
The girl said, "My parents left me, so I would have one dollar."
You never think of how people will react to an event. My friend gets discounts at any store he goes to.
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
I'll give you 20 dollars if you let me cum in you.
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
To be wanted.
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
Your teeth are sponsored by gap.
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
What is money called in space?
Star bucks.
Why were ET's eyes so big?
Because he saw the phone bill.
What do you call a rich Chinese man?
Cha-ching!
Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?
Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.
In an alternate universe: I don't know how to solve the power of 10, but I do know how to pay taxes.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, each with a buck and a quarter. Jill came down with $2.50, that fuckin' whore.