Film jokes
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would the title be?
Mine would be "Alien Vs. Predator."
You heard of Spider-Man: No Way Home. Now get ready for:
Orphan: No Way Home.
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
A poor person came up to me and said, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."
Joe mama's so hairy when she went to the movie theater, the people thought she was Chewbacca!
Memes
Someone in my class yelled "Jenga!" while watching a documentary about the Twin Towers.
Forrest Gump: Who's your favorite Lord of the Rings character?
Lieutenant Dan: Legaless.
Kid: My parents want to meet you, you wanna come over?
Orphan: Na, I'm good. I'm going to watch Home Alone. It's the only movie that I can think of that's related to me.
What do an orphan's parents and the Predator have in common?
They are both invisible.
In the new Justice League movie, Flash can break glass by touching it, why is that?
Because Flash is not supported on Windows.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she’ll let it goo!
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she'll let it go!
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints.
Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
Bro, yo mama so fat Thanos had to clap her out of existence.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
Those t.p. jokes are getting shittier by the second.