Film jokes
Why did the cow cross the road to go to the moovies?
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
Chuck Norris threw a grenade once. It killed 300 people.
And then it exploded.
What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?
Alien vs. Predator.
I was excited to watch Fast and Furious because of Dom Toretto, then I realized family is nothing to me 'cause I'm an orphan.
Memes
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
Who said white people can't jump?
Look at the footage from 9/11.
What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?
"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.
What is an orphan's favorite naval film?
"Spider-Man: No Way Home."
Why is Harry Potter an orphan's favorite character?
Because Harry Potter has no parents, so it’s relatable.
Bro, you can't talk; you look like the dwarf from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Stormtrooper: Hey Palpatine! Luke is Vader's son.
Palpatine: Knew it.
What do you call a cow that lives in Africa? Moo-fasa!
Race car backwards is race car.
Race car sideways is how Paul Walker died.
They finally made a movie about a clock, about time.
Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.
Is your dad Spider-Man, because he got no way home?
Q. What did one Iron atom say to the other Iron atom?
A. "We're in the Matrix."
What do you call security outside a Samsung store?
Guardians of the Galaxy.
Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:
Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)
East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)
Jew...Rey (Ray)
Black...BB-8 (BBC)
Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)
German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)