Fat jokes

What goes black, white, black, white, down a hill?

A fat nun.

There was once a young sister who never got anything good for her birthday, and she was sick of it. So one day the girl asked for a puppy, and the parents said yes.

When she got the puppy, he was nice, but the puppy needed food every two minutes. The parents eventually got sick of it and came up with a plan. Two weeks passed and the younger and less fat sister asked where her other sister was as she wanted to play Barbies. “And also, why haven’t you been feeding the dog? He needs food, you know.” The parents only answered with “Oh! Yes, you can have a room all to yourself now. And about the puppy...he won’t need feeding for years.”

Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?

A: Do these genes make my butt look fat? 💩

Your mom is so fat nobody can compare her to anything.

I have a fat ass.

I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.

You're so fat, when you say the n-word, boogers come out.

I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.

Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.

Yo mama so fat she ate Saturn and mistook it for bubble gum.

Yo mama is so fat that people had to take pictures of her from space.

Your mama's so fat, she needed NASA to make her ID card!

Yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man, her bowels fell out.

Yo mama is so fat that she crushed her PlayStation profile.

You are so fat and ugly, Chucky didn't even want to play with you.

I had bullies behind me on the street, but they were too fat and slow, so they got ran over by a truck that represents fat and slow.

Your mama is so fat that when she sat down on the couch for a family picture, it was just her.

Your mama is so fat, she only knows three words: KFC.

Yo mama so fat, her future is brighter than VY Canis Majoris!

My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.

You know somebody has a fat ass when someone is standing between you and them, and all you can focus on is that trunk.