Farm

Farm jokes

Cow

  • A cow was standing in a corn field. The chicken walked by and said annoyingly, "What do I see here? Corned beef!?"

    Cow

  • Q: If there were two moo cows walking down the street, where would they be going?

    A: Home to see their mama!

    Horse

  • Your uncle Jack is stuck on the horse...

    Would you help him jack off the horse?

    Milk

  • Child: *drinking milk*

    Farmer: Hey, what are you doing?

    Child: Oh, I just milked one of your cows.

    Farmer: We don't have any cows, we only have bulls.

    Child: *realizes*

    Cow

  • Old Mother Riley, had a fat cow.

    She milked it and milked it but didn't know how, she pulled his tail, pulled his tits. Old Mother Riley was covered in sh!t.

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  • Udder

  • Why do four polish heteroflexable men like to suck on four of the cow's udders? Because a bull has only one.

  • 0
  • Cow

  • Why did two dumb blondes put condoms on the cow's udders because they wanted the cow to practice safe sex?

    Shepherd

  • Q: Ten shepherds out in the sheep field. How do you know which one's gay?

    A: He's the one the sheep fuck!

    (I'm gay, and I know this joke is demeaning and inappropriate, but I still think it's funny as a 2-inch penis.)

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  • Hen

  • What did the swearing hen say?

    "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" (It's cluck.)

    What did the cussing rooster say?

    "Cock-a-doodle-doo, phew!"

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  • Chicken

  • Why did the farmer's wife chase the chickens out of the yard?

    'Cause they were using fowl language!

    Cow

  • What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?

    Mooooooooooo along!