Farm jokes
Why did the farmer's wife chase the chickens out of the yard?
'Cause they were using fowl language!
What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?
Mooooooooooo along!
Who disliked the rooster joke, come out now!
What did the rooster say to the hen? Goodbye.
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says "leave motherf*cker".
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."
What did the bull say when got hit in the special area? "Damn my bulls!" Ahahaha
What is a cow?
We just got a new chicken-proof lawn. It's impeccable.
A chicken is delicious.
Dad: You’re looking pretty sheepish.
Son: That’s too baaaaaad!
What does the chicken say when he didn't understand something?
"What hap-HENd?"
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
Chicken
Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?
A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄
What do you call a calf that is in no way brave?
A coward.
If chickens wake up when the rooster crows, then when do ducks wake up?
At the quack of dawn.
How do you spot a cow?
With a bingo dabber.
The chicken is so fat.
Cow: *can't be milked for 20 years*
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