Farm jokes
What happened when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence? Complete and utter destruction.
A farmer counted 196 cows in the field.
But when he rounded them up, he had 200.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
For absolutely no reason.
Once my dad left to get milk, then I realized we own a cow.
I'd make a farming joke, but I'm just a little less than corny enough.
What’s a cow with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Why did the cow jump over the moon?
Because the farmer had cold hands!
Where do sheep go to shop?
Woolmart.
What goes "Ooooooo"?
A cow with no lips.
Why did the turkey suck my bacon? Because it wanted cum in its mouth.
What do you call a three-legged cow?
Disabled.
What did one angry cow say to another?
We got some beef.
A momma cow and three baby calves are on a farm. The first baby calf asks the momma cow, "Mom, why is my name Rose?"
The mom responded, "Well, you see, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."
The second one asks her, "Then why is my name Daisy?"
The mom chuckled and simply replied with, "When you were born, Daisy petals fell on your head."
The last one said, "DUH DUR SURH!"
The mom said, "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!"
Why didn't the rooster cross the road?
Because he was a chicken!
Knock knock. Who's there? Cows go. Cows go who? No silly, cows go moo!
Why can you never find a virgin cow on a field with no bulls for miles? Just ask the redneck farmer.
What do you call a broken chicken?
A broken chicken.
There are 5 cows in a field. One of them is the mom, the rest are kids. One of the kids walked up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Daisy?" and then a daisy fell on her head.
The second cow came up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Rose?" and then a rose fell on her head. Then the 3rd cow said, "Why am I named Violet?" then a violet fell on her head. Then the 4th cow walked up and said, "Merrrbere." Then the mom said, "Shutup, cinder block!"
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off!
Where do cows stop to drink?
The Milky Way!