Family jokes
Me: Knock knock.
My sister: Who's there?
Me: I eat mop.
My sister: I eat mop who?
My mind: I eat my poo.
My sister getting it.
Am I considered a cannibal because I told my mom that Grandma's ashes were sugar?
I saw a kid crying today. I asked him where his parents were.
I love working at an orphanage.
Why can't orphans breathe? They are drowning in their own tears.
What does an iPhone have that orphans do not?
Home buttons.
To all of you making jokes about orphans, it’s all fun and games until both of your parents leave you.
LMFAO (my parents left me and it’s not the funniest thing ever)
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were.
Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
This shit is weird (as baby girl pees).
Dad: “Trust me, shitting is weirder.”
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
Why can orphans get away with robbing the bank?
Because no one wants him.
I once saw an orphan... I decided to ask them a simple question... "Hey! Where is your family?"
They didn't reply.
I kept asking them. They started crying. I started laughing. They ran away...
Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.
What do an orphan and a homeless person have in common?
They have no one to call "Dad."
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
I want to be loved.
Son: Hey, Dad, I'm cold. Can you give me a lift from work?
Dad: Hi Cold, nice to meet you. Sorry, I don't pick up strangers.
Son: I hate you!
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find their home.😁😁
What’s the difference between a dad and a boulder?
About 15 stone.
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.”
I’m not sure what she’s talking about. I opened the fridge door, and it’s working fine!
How do you know an orphan is lying? When they swear on their mother's life.