Family jokes
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
My grandpa's last words were, "Why is there a body in my kitchen?"
No witnesses.
Last Christmas, I took a picture of your mom.
It's still printing.
What do you get when you cross the terms homeless and abandoned?
POORphan
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
Memes
Why do orphans always go to church? Because that’s the only place they could call someone "father."
Evan, yo mum rode on my big PP love, dad.
Papyrus: Sans, can you call Undyne for me and tell her that I found a human!
Sans: Sure bro, lemme just get on the Tele-bone.
Papyrus: Ssssaaaaannnnsss!!!!!!
Sans: Yea bro.
Papyrus: You know what? I will tell Undyne instead.
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because its uncles were all aunts!
When your uncle drops a nickel, but the only thing he really drops is his pants.
I saw a dad shave his daughter's head because she made fun of a woman with cancer.
Good thing she didn’t make fun of a pregnant woman 🤭
Why is my sister horny? It's because she loves my dick.
I like your mom naked.
What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?
My stepdad did beat cancer.
I was crying while my dad was cutting onions in the kitchen. Onions was such a good dog.
I saw an orphan and I said, "Yo."
He said, "What do you want?"
I said, "To be your new father."
"Really??!" the orphan said.
Me: Lol, no.
Orphan *Jumps into street*
My nan broke her toe on a brick today. Last time she broke her toe because she kicked her car tire. Does that now mean I have to tow her back to the doctors?
Cow A: I slept with your sister!
Cow B: Never knew my brother was a girl!
All the other cows:
:O
Me: Hey, I’m your mom.
Orphan: Yay, you came back!
Me: Sike!
Child: "Mom, what's an 'orgasm'?"
Mom: "I don't know, dear. Try asking your father."