Family jokes
One time the dog got bit by a snake, so my dad had to shoot it. My dad said to me, "This is what's going to happen to your little brother." "What little brother?" Exactly.
What do you call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum.
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.
Why do mostly younger orphans get adopted?
Because who wants a traffic an adult?
Why can't orphans see all these jokes on this website that we're posting?
'Cause they don't know where the home page is.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
My grandpa's last words were, "Why is there a body in my kitchen?"
No witnesses.
Why do orphans always go to church? Because that’s the only place they could call someone "father."
Last Christmas, I took a picture of your mom.
It's still printing.
What do you get when you cross the terms homeless and abandoned?
POORphan
Evan, yo mum rode on my big PP love, dad.
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
When your uncle drops a nickel, but the only thing he really drops is his pants.
Why is my sister horny? It's because she loves my dick.
What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?
My stepdad did beat cancer.
If you have a twin sister, do you have the same name? Only if your mom and dad give you the same name.
I saw an orphan and I said, "Yo."
He said, "What do you want?"
I said, "To be your new father."
"Really??!" the orphan said.
Me: Lol, no.
Orphan *Jumps into street*
I like your mom naked.
My nan broke her toe on a brick today. Last time she broke her toe because she kicked her car tire. Does that now mean I have to tow her back to the doctors?