Family jokes
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because its uncles were all aunts!
I saw a dad shave his daughter's head because she made fun of a woman with cancer.
Good thing she didn’t make fun of a pregnant woman 🤭
My enemy told me I’m adopted, so I told him at least I got adopted.
One time the dog got bit by a snake, so my dad had to shoot it. My dad said to me, "This is what's going to happen to your little brother." "What little brother?" Exactly.
Joe Mama so fat that when Santa came to our house he said, "Ho ho HOLY SHIT, she damn thick."
Why can’t orphans play catch?
They never had a dad to teach them.
How are orphans like Spider-Man?
No way home.
Your mum is gay; her name is Rachel.
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
"Uh daddy harder," the orphan said. Oh wait, he doesn’t have a daddy.
A kid goes to bed with his dad because he’s scared of the dark. Turns out he just wanted to have sex.
Why do orphans get iPhones 11?
Because it has no home page.
A girl walks in the room. She asks her mom, "Why's my name Flower?" Her mom said, "When you were born, a flower fell on your head." Brick walks in the room. Jasvidnqzkdvsosbd.
If you're bored, punch an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
Why do orphans always go to church? Because that’s the only place they could call someone "father."
When your brother sends you to go get a box of condoms for his b-day. (* *)
"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.
Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."
Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"
I love orphans, so at least they know someone loves them.
I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why they were crying.
They said: "Because I lost my parents."
I said: "Let's find them."
They cried harder, so I walked out of the orphanage.