Family jokes
Why can’t orphans use computers?
Because they don’t have a homepage.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You slept with my cousin but I did too.
I went to a butcher house with my little cousin and saw a baby pig and told her, "Look, it's Pepa Pig!"
She started crying.
What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?
They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.
What does an orphan have that a homeless person doesn’t?
A home, but what does a homeless person have that orphans don’t?
A parent.
Last time I ate a vegetable, I got banned from my sister's group home.
Everyone says Kenny has an easy life.
I disagree. I hear his mom likes complicated sex positions.
My son said he burnt food on accident, so I told him he was an accident.
Why can’t you give an orphan homework?
Because they don’t have a home to do it in.
How do men like their women? Striped.
How does a priest like their children? Clean.
Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.
What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.
Why do black people call each other brothers? Because they don't know who their fathers are.
There's a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking.
At least Stephen Hawking does something.
I don't understand the plane crash at 9/11. My dad was a great pilot!
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can’t find home.
Me nan.
Your mum is so smart, but she still can’t figure out why she had you.
So I got my son a trampoline for Christmas this year, and he was so ungrateful, like he just sat there crying in his wheelchair. What has this world come to?
Principal: You're being bad. I'm gonna need to call your parents!
Orphan: *sits there sadly*
Like this if you are in foster care.
When you go to Incestry.com instead of Ancestry.com.