Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
My nan's gayyyyyy.
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
What is more time-consuming than children?
Waiting for your wife to go into labor!
Come on guys, this is nasty, he was my uncle, ffs :(
Yo momma so fat, her four kids use her as a bed and her fat rolls as cozy blankets.
Your mum gay, lol.
My mum.
What's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a car in my garage.
A guy walks into the house carrying a sheep and says out loud, "This is the pig I screw when you're on the rag."
His wife replies, "That's not a pig, it's a sheep."
He says, "I was talking to the sheep."
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
Q: The person who makes it doesn't say what it is.
The person who receives it doesn't know what it is.
The person who knows what it is doesn't want it.
What am I?
A: A baby.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.
What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a BMW in my garage.
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
My grandfather had the heart of a lion,
and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Your mom gay.
Why does Sally have 100 sisters? She lives in an orphanage.
Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."
