I was walking down the street when I saw my ex-girlfriend, so I fucked her. Turns out it was her identical twins that she never told me about.
And I decided to confront her. So I did the next time I saw her, but this time it was her identical triplet. There are 3 of them...
AND SHE NEVER BROUGHT THAT UP IN THE 7 YEARS I WAS DATING HER!
You ever look back at your ex and are like, "Wow! What was I thinking?"
Then I start to think I was the problem :(
Just kidding, fuck that asshole!
Why did the dinosaur take a bath?
So it can get ex-stinked!
My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
My ex-wife misses me, but her aim is getting better.
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
Today was the worst day of my life. My ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
What are the similarities between the twin towers and my ex?
They both went down on my dad.
Hello! I'm Taylor, and this is my life story with me and my ex girl. So when I was little, I met this girl. Her name was Leah. We were besties for a while until I turned 13. Then I asked if she wanted to date me. She said yes!
But one day, in the middle of school, she was talking to another man!!!!!!! AND THEY HUGGED AND KISSED EACH OTHER ON THE CHEEK!!!!!! Then, she told me she hated me. I was so upset!!!!!!!! Whatever you do, don't follow the ugly rat!!!!!!!!! <3
My ex wanted to humiliate me in front of her friends, so she said I was useless in bed.
Should have seen her face when they all disagreed.
My ex-friends are depressed. Their names are Kaitlyn and Ava.
Your butt is bigger than my ex-girlfriend's butt, and I love it!
What do the Twin Towers and my ex have in common?
They both fell on my dad.
My ex.
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?
Today my ex got hit by a bus.
I also lost my job as a bus driver.
Suicide is as easy as my ex-wife.
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression f**ks you harder.
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I?
