I went to the National Redhead Meeting yesterday.
Not a soul in sight.
Saying I'm sorry and I apologize are basically the same thing... except at a funeral.
Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: Twin Tower victims, they got 80 stories in ten seconds.
How do you start a rave?
Throw a flashbang into the epileptic ward of a hospital.
I don't like 9/11 jokes, they tend to crash and burn.
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
"Did you go to the light show?"
"Yeah, it was lit."
How do you light up a football stadium? With a football match.
I hate prom in Alabama. They always say, "Uhh, actually this is our family reunion." We are in Alabama, so they are the same thing.
If you're in Alabama, family reunions are basically speed dating events.
Q: When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?
A: Hiroshima, Japan 1946.
Sally threw herself a birthday party, and only one person showed up. Who is it?
The grim reaper.
September 11th. #BringYourPlaneToWorkDay
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Thanos snapped.
Who is the fastest reader? 9/11, it went through 10 stories in 7 seconds.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday.
6 Germans walk into a bar... and only three walk out.
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
Hey, did you know that 9/11 won a Grammy?
Yes, best comedy award.
