Event jokes
What hit the ground first in 9/11? The people.
My grandma told me I was next at my brother's wedding, so I told her she was next at her husband's funeral.
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims, they did 98 stories in 10 seconds.
Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her on Halloween.
Why was the peanut butter upset at his retirement party?
He was roasted.
Where did Sally go during the bombings? Everywhere!
Why didnβt the parents bother looking for her? Because she was in the front and back yard in small chunks! π
Are you a building?
Cuz I rate you 9/11.
Happy New Year! ππππ
I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a muscle.
You can't spell "Funeral" without "fun."
A father came to his daughter's 18th birthday. He finally came.
Why is six scared of seven? Because 7 8 9.
Then why was 10 scared? Because he was between 9/11.
So I went to Comic-Con and saw a man with an arm missing, and I thought, "Cool display," until I heard him screaming and getting the other arm chopped off. Then I said, "Man, now that's a 10/10 display, wow!"
Why canβt orphans go to daughter and dad dance night? They donβt have a dad to go with.
One day I'm walking and I saw Josh B. He's sucking balls and Marco jump[s], and we got [an] earthquake, and I say, "Yamate."
Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?
Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
What's the difference between your mum and the Twin Towers?
I would smash the Twin Towers.
Q: What is 9 + 11?
A: 9/11
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.