Event jokes
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
At weddings, old people tell kids, "You're next!"
At funerals, little kids tell old people, "You're next!"
You're so ugly, you have trick-or-treat on the phone!
Who are the fastest readers? Nine-eleven victims, because they fell through 720 stories in under 10 seconds.
Who are the fastest readers? The people who were in 9/11. They went through 91 stories in 1.2 seconds.
How are Kobe’s death and people in 9/11 the same? They both hit the ground really hard.
I was going to invite your friends to your birthday, but they were all extinct.
Why is September 11th an awesome birthday to have?
Because no one forgets it! :)
Q: Why do Americans suck at Clash Royale?
A: Because they already lost two towers!
Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.
What makes all these categories so familiar? Either you've experienced them, or made them up in your backstory.
"Did you go to the biscuit eating championship?"
"Yea, it was crackers!"
Who said white people can't jump?
Look at the footage from 9/11.
Yo mama is so fat, they had to flood the Super Bowl to give her a bath.
What's the one thing me and the New Year's ball have in common?
It's not gonna be the only thing falling 50 stories this New Year's.
These 9/11 jokes are just plane wrong.
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Why was six scared of seven? Because 7 ate 9. Why was 10 scared? Because it was between 9/11.
Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house? Because the ghosts bring all the boos.
[concert] SINGER: How's everyone doin' tonight? CROWD: Woo! ME (from the back in a normal speaking voice): It's actually been a tough few months.
Everybody knows the joke: Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because seven ate nine.
But why was 10 scared? Because he was right in the middle of 9/11.